Cribs

This is a wombat and a platypus, and in case you can’t discern between them, the wombat is a short-legged marsupial, and the platypus is an egg laying, lactating creature with venomous spurs on its hind (webbed) foot. And both of them make highly faithful pets.

Until I found out that they’re sleeping with other people. Bad times, very bad times indeed.

Being the hive-minded individual part of the horde I am, I mindlessly trudged into COMEX 2008, the largest trap in Singapore, which operates under the guise of a computer and electronic goods fair and walked away with a camera, and a swiped up NETS card and a promise to tighten my wallet (2 hours later: mmmMMM, IKEA meatbals! Three times the usual price of my dinner but five times as delicous, and for $1.50 you can get free flowing coffee and tea! It’s a sound investment right? It doesn’t matter that I only managed to drank two cups of tea and was devouring instant noodles for supper right?)

Trying to justify my rather impulsive purchase, I made through the cover of the manual and learned how to take some pictures without using the Auto mode.

My room, and its loophole infested rule of doing ten push ups everytime you enter it. Loopholes include:

i) You’re exempted if you’re a zombie, a vampire or an Ah Ject.
ii) You’re pretty much exempted if there are guests in the room.
iii) Your backlog would be reset at the end of the month.
iv) You’re exempted if you did/brought back something that’ll benefit everyone in the room.
v) etc.

This is the last sight room rule offenders see when they turn their head left before we decapitate him/her by slamming door onto the neck.

When offenders raise their head slightly to say their last word.

When offenders talk to their imaginary friends who live in the skies and (in some cases) tell us that the world was filled with dinosaurs 4000 years ago.

Our room’s local deity. instead of offering incense, we offer pencils. Usually He’ll make three of them disappear a day, it’s just like magic! Its ceremonial war mask is one of the many treasures in my room, others include:

A mic/bazooka/bat/poking device/fourth dimension sound portal.

Instead of eating vegan food or listening to some sermon, our deity make us barge into heretic’s rooms and force them to convert.

This blog post is approved by NTU SU’s biatches when asked by their prospective employers “What is your greatest achievement as a student leader?” (Tips: Your boss won’t be impressed by name cards that cost eight dollars per pack, unless of course you’re working at citibank. (I guess they’re really impressed with name cards there seeing how persistent a certain citibank intern is about getting them.))